The Day After Valentines

I was dismayed this year by how many Valentine Cards from husbands to wives were really just romantically disguised apologies. As I picked through the selections, I read card after card which in essence said, “I know I haven’t really told you ‘I love you’ since last Valentines so please forgive me. But hey, I remembered to today.” Talk about weak, as husbands let’s be strong! Valentines is not meant to be a built in calendar reminder to tell your wife you love her. It is meant to be a celebration of a year long love you enjoy with her.

There is a reason so many cards are written in an apologetic form. Truth is many (certainly not all) husbands come up short in this area. Husband, your wife needs you to communicate your love to her. She literally needs to see and hear how strong your love is for her all year and not just at Valentines. 1 Peter 3 speaks to this by saying “husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel.” The idea in this verse of ‘weaker vessel’ has nothing to do with inferiority. It does, however, have everything to do with her needing your strength. Just as we need her tenderness; she needs our strength. In particular, she is looking for man who is strong in his commitment and passion for her. (If you need help in understanding this just watch any so called ‘chick flick’- o.k., maybe just read reviews about them.) A wife is looking for a man who is true to his vow and strong enough to repeat it over and over. She longs to place herself under the protection she finds in your love.

There are two ways to go this day after Valentines: way number 1- stay the course, wait ’till next Valentines Day to try wooing her and telling her you love her. (Hint: this leaves her feeling unprotected by a weak man.) Way number 2- work hard this year at saying ‘I love you’ often. (Hint: this leaves her protected and secure. Extra hint: a protected and secure wife will blossom and be a blessing to you!)

As men we want to be seen as strong; it is our nature. This year be strong for her in the way she needs you to be strong. When Valentines Day comes next year, you can confidently search for a card that reinforces the strength you have shown instead of apologizing for the lack of it.

One thought on “The Day After Valentines

  1. SO AWESOME! Thanks for this post! Its been so frustrating to watch so many of my friends and acquaintances call it quits and end their marriages over the last few years. While weak men aren’t the only reason for failing relationships, it certainly is one of them! This is such a great call to men to stand up and Love their wives with Strength and Honor!

    Thanks again for the encouragement!

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